Persistently being consumed by concerns about one’s family


“The person who holds his children or his parents, or something else so dear to him that he constantly worries about them, is also an idol worshipper. […] What does progeny amount to? A mother sacrifices her life for them from birth, but it is seen that upon growing up, many sons disobey their mothers and treat them with contempt. And even if they are obedient, at the time of her grief or discomfort, they cannot remove them from her. Even if she suffers a little pain in her stomach, everyone becomes helpless – neither the son nor the husband or the mother or any other relative can be of much use. It is only God who proves to be of help. So, what good is so much love and adoration for them that would count as shirk? God Almighty says:

اِنَّمَاۤ اَمۡوَالُکُمۡ وَاَوۡلَادُکُمۡ فِتۡنَۃٌ

“‘Verily, your wealth and your children are a trial.’ (Surah at-Taghabun, Ch. 64: V. 16)

“Look, suppose God were to tell someone that He would bring back to life all his children who have died, but then he would have no relationship with God – would a wise person even consider opting for his children?“In conclusion, the good fortune for man is verily in him giving precedence to God over everything. The person who becomes disgruntled over the death of his children is also a miser, as he is reluctant to return what was given to him by God as a trust. For a miser, it is mentioned in a hadith that even if his worship were to equal the rivers in the wilderness, he would not enter Paradise. Thus, worship, prayer, fasting, etc., are of no use to a person if his love for anything is greater than his love for God.”

(Al Hakam, 22 August 1908; Malfuzat [English], Vol. 10, pp. 423-425)

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